Black heart

I had set the wind on fire, I couldn't stand it carrying your name.
I cried in shame as I watched the ashes travel into the deepest oceans that I had poisoned, I couldn't stand the intimacy you shared with water. 
I planted sorrow into the soil, buried it deep and weeped as I watched everything wither, all because you relied on its crops.
As I fell apart and faded away with the world I had destroyed, I realized that I was the one that had you now and yet there was nothing left. 
I had killed us both.

There's no one.

I've made mistakes with a clear mind just to learn what I already knew.
I've chased after the unknown just to find what I never wanted nor needed.
I've lied to myself even though I could read the truth every time I looked in the mirror.
I've put up stop signs with the knowledge of not wanting to just for the sake of it.
I've ignored the only sanity I had because I let fear conquer.
I've let fear conquer with a clear mind, let it lead me to what I didn't want nor needed, even though I could se the truth in the mirror, just for the sake of it.

There's no one.

I blame me.

Gaze

Blast me up into space,
leave me in the void.
Drown me in the bluest water,
leave me on the bottom.
Throw me out of a plane,
leave me helpless amongst clouds.
Still nothing compares to the prison of your gaze.

You

All I see is you.
I see your lips move, the awareness of you speaking strikes me, but all I am capable of doing is to see: you.
My hearing is useless, my mind goes blank, there's nothing surrounding us.
I feel nothing
I've gone completely numb
'cause all I see, all I know is: you.

A five minutes project

Nevermind the scrambled words. Feelings always find their own way of saying. Nothing is more enlightening than the unspoken thought. When ever or where ever; what you see is what you feel, not necessarily created in that order. What your thoughts tell you to see is what your heart has already felt. You dream, think, eat, act, walk, work even live the way you were taught by emotions. Emotions arise from experience. In order to get something new, you'll have to force your entire being into doing what has never been felt.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

Do what you know

I speak the truth, that's the only thing I know and feel. I lay action on the recipients shoulders. I know nothing about doing but I know everything about feeling.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

Forgive me.

I wrote it down, a word for every heartbeat. A heartbeat for every memory.
Memories are said to be a reminder of what used to be.
But what are they when what used to be isn't what it should have been because I didn't play my part?
What are memories then, other than a painful reminder of how blind one can be?
So I wrote it down, every event that I misinterpreted, every word that I didn't understand, every time I pushed you away. For every word that was written another one was whispered; I'm sorry.

Yesterday remains as it was left, today is what we make of it, tomorrow is what we created today.

Today we can create a tomorrow that should have been yesterday. 

Now I know what I've should have known, I'm sorry.

Forgive me.